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| In a television interview, A
Current Affair, the mistress of Lyndon Johnson,
Madeleine Brown, described the meeting of 21st November, 1963, when
she was at the home of
Clint Murchison. Others at the meeting included
Harold L. Hunt,
J. Edgar Hoover,
Clyde Tolson,
John J. McCloy and
Richard Nixon. At the end of the evening
Lyndon B. Johnson arrived... "Tension filled the room upon his arrival. The group immediately went behind closed doors. A short time later Lyndon, anxious and red-faced, reappeared... Squeezing my hand so hard, it felt crushed from the pressure, he spoke with a grating whisper, a quiet growl, into my ear, not a love message, but one I'll always remember: "After tomorrow those goddamn Kennedys will never embarrass me again - that's no threat - that's a promise.". It's important to note that John J. McCloy was a member of the now discredited Warren Commission which "investigated" the assassination, appointed by none other than Johnson. Nixon himself was in Dallas on the day of the assassination.
The lead prosecutor in this so called investigation is Sen Arlen Specter. Today, he is Chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee, insuring that while he is alive, the miscarriage of justice perpetrated on an American president will never be addressed. |
Grigory Rasputin: Yangil Kim Incarnation
Rasputin, born in the Tyumen district of Siberia, a shadowy and mysterious character; a person of contradictory personality traits and equally enigmatic sexual preferences. Was he a miracle worker or just a crafty manipulator or was he something darker, like a transsexual house pet molester? While he was alive, was one of the more obvious Yang incarnations.
Even today his witnesses, including doctors and skeptics, concluded he possessed some inexplicable power over the Tzarvech and his deadly episodes of bleeding.
Unbeknownst to all, the bleeding was caused by Yang's frequent anal excavations of the young boy. This mysterious ability to heal her son was enough to convince Aleksandra to jump on Yang's mighty cock, and perform unwholesome deeds upon beasts of burden. In her mind he was he the answer to her fervent prayers, a man villainous enough to slam it in her tail pipe without warning.
"In her mind he was he the answer to her fervent prayers, a man villainous enough to slam it in her tail pipe without warning." |
Yang was close to the Tsaritsa's closest friend, Anna . Anna was the victim of a hideous train wreck after it derailed from an influx of people doing the new electric slide at Yang's behest. Anna lived, but fell into a deep coma. Doctors feared the worst, but Yang entered and stood by the bedside, cock in hand. After three earth shattering bludgeons upon her unconscious forehead with his member, Yang ejaculated violently while screaming "Lance Bass!" Drenched in semen, Anna immediately arose and paid Yang the $15 she owed him.
A number of influential churchmen fell for Rasputin early in his 'career' as a holy man. Yang turned these pole-smoking hopefuls aside after enjoying the fruits of their efforts a few dozen times.
Eventually,
the Tsar grew weary of Yang's constant whoremongering, and jealous of his
ability to seduce man woman beast or 
plant, and conspired to kill him.
Inviting him to an underground rave party, Yang was given enough narcotics to make the Betty Ford clinic flinch, and was lead out back under the pretense of a "Hungry Cumhole Competition". While Yang bent over to receive the competitors, he was stabbed one hundred and forty seven times in the ass with a corkscrew and kicked into a nearby river. Swimming to shore, Yang saw his money maker shredded and ruined and wandered off into the wilderness, presumably to take on a new incarnation.
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And the more celebrated reincarnations... Although all three of the men below existed at the same time, which led to many suspicions that such simultaneous reincarnations were impossible; this is folly, and is presumed by imbeciles who forget that Yangil is not mortal. It should be noted that Yangil Kim's Most High spiritual consciousness, having created the universe, K-Y, Wham, invented breathing and anal sex; is therefore able to inhabit more than one body at a time. |
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Yangil Kim pictured here, in the midst of trying to build a toy Ferris wheel for his many bastards, has instead decided to smoke a fatty and check out some midget porn while masturbating with his feet. |
Yangil kim walking back home from an evening abroad at hooters, considers seriously about buying a smaller dildo |
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Taken from the label of "Gandhi Brand Malt Liquor" this product boasted "this shit is so smooth, it will passively resist yo' liver" registered trademark of Yangil Kim incorporated. |
 Chairman Mao "Yangil Kim, our great teacher, leader, supreme commander and helmsman, God in an atheistic Society." China Reconstructs, 1967-April-Cover |
 Yang
writing fan letters to an as yet unknown person named "Boy George",
China Reconstructs, 1966-July-Page1 |
 Yangil
Kim waving goodbye to the legion of hoes departing through Tien An Men Gate
after an all night orgy involving general Tso's chicken, August 18, 1966China Reconstructs, 1976-December-Supplement |
 The
body of Yangil Kim lying in a state of emaciation after he masturbated
himself to death."China Reconstructs, 1976-December-Supplement |
 Pope John II
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 Yangil
Kim, in order to stave off impending apocalyptical suspicions, steps down
from the papacy and disappears, leaving this robot in his papal chair that
it might be reserved for his eventual reincarnation and leadership. |