Anne Rice Expressionism:

The Goth Art Movement

In Germany, only the surreal is real....

In America, David Hasselhoff would be signing surplus Christmas CDs at Wal-Mart appearances alongside John Tesh. In Germany,  he's a rock star, a Teutonic Elvis. Germans used to scare me. Now they make me wet my pants. One look at this collection of unholy Anne Rice Expressionism and you know that Rice is required reading in every German seminary...for she is a very common theme in this series. Indeed, her influence is so pervasive in this art one almost concludes that the German pulpits carry no Bibles, only Anne Rice paper backs.

There's only thing creepier than a woman whose erotic literature includes vampires clam-diving on menstruating women. And that is the artist who finds the visuals erotic and tasteful enough to paint.

Very little is known about who created this artwork, or why. We just know it originated in Germany, and that is exceedingly bad.  Some of the pictures, which I received sans title or link, I shall have to title until I am informed otherwise.

"Martha Stewart meets her Cellmate" "It's a good thing." Not. A woman in bondage. A half-vampire, half reptile rapist with a wandering vibrator. Sigh. John Wayne Gacy, the serial killer, at least painted clowns. Couldn't this plebeian have chosen a more cheerful theme to take our minds off the fact that the artist will probably kill again?

"Bambi Give Me Head!" You're naked. You are in the woods. You're petting Bambi. Don't act so surprised, dear, you know you like it. Bambi's mother died...now I think I know why. From shame.

"SCATS: The Musical" Is this cat person trying to fellate itself, clean its anus, or both? Auto-erotic scatology never looked so bad.

"The Writing on the Wall" OK. there must be a message here...the angel on the wall, watching a naked man in a sombrero pissing against the wall in what appears to be serene reflection. What could that message be? What is the artist trying to tell us? Let me venture a guess... "Why the fuck did I stop taking my meds?"